Friday, June 20, 2008

A Same Sex Wedding Quiz: Why is the Ring Finger the RING Finger? And what does that have to do with Reflexology?

Okay, I didn't know this until this week (but I've been wearing my wedding ring, pre-legal wedding, for six years 17 days now...)

Besides tradition, it turns out there is a reason why we wear our wedding rings on the fourth finger of the left hand.


****
ready for it?


****


It turns out that back in the 16th century, physicians claimed that a vein on this finger ran directly to the heart. It was called the Vena Amoris, which is Latin for

VEIN OF LOVE

(you can link here to the wikipedia site on it).


Wild, huh?

Now, how does this relate to reflexology?

I'm not sure if this image is authentically ancient (I found it here), but it's certainly in the Egyptian style and shows some hand and foot reflexology going on...



I wonder if the whole reflexology movement had been more prominent in Egypt when Alexander the Great conquered it, that instead of our western culture adapting the Egyptian custom of a ring to symbolize love, if the bottom of the left foot, right at the ball of the foot, would have had to be wrapped in gold thread or something.

See the small oval area in bright red below? That's the spot on the foot that practitioners of reflexology believe is linked to the heart.


But I guess that might have been awkward, huh?


After all,

The symbolism of the rings given in engagement and marriage is not only union in love but also publicly avowed commitment.

And having a band of gold wrapped around your left foot might be silly and in the way... then again, maybe THAT's where the decorative band on those goofy sweatsocks everyone wore in the 70s came from? Although that would have missed the reflexology spot, as well the fashion boat, huh?



Okay, I admit it - that was simply an excuse to show you a pic of Cheyenne Jackson from the Broadway show Xanadu, who I think looks, err... IS great, even if the Tony awards didn't show their love for him...

So, gay or straight, if you've got a wedding ring on your vein of love, wear it with pride!

I know my oh-so-soon-to-be-LEGAL husband and I do!


Namaste,

Lee

ps: The quote on ring symbolism is from a neat little book "1,001 symbols: An illustrated guide to imagery and its meaning" by Jack Tresidder.


Thursday, June 19, 2008

Mosh Pit


By Kristyn Dunnion

Simone is a Teenage Lesbian Punk, whose friend Cherry quits high school and hooks up with a drug dealer.

This plunges Simone into a world of punks, drugs, and sex workers as she struggles with her loyalty to Cherry and her attraction to the sexy and streetwise Carol.


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Wednesday, June 18, 2008

The World Of Normal Boys


By K. M. Soehnlein

It's the 1970s. Robin is a freshman in High School in the New Jersey suburbs, and as much as he wants to fit in with the "World of Normal Boys" - he doesn't.

He's attracted to other boys.

And as Robin tries to deal with his parents, cope with injury of his younger brother, and figure out being gay, he realizes that he's going to need to find a place in the world where he DOES fit in...


"The World Of Normal Boys" won the Lamdba Literary Foundation's award for best Gay Men's Fiction in 2000.

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Tuesday, June 17, 2008

Same Sex Marriage: What the World Needs Now!

And in the place and on the day where the personal becomes public and maybe even political, I'll share with everyone that the song my love and I started off our wedding ceremony with more than six years ago now was this one. In a ceremony that was family and friends and religion and truly of our hearts, we gave out lyric sheets and had everyone sing along:






And the message of that song, and of our wedding, is still true today, the day when our being a family together was finally able to be acknowledged with our applying for and receiving a legal marriage license in our home state (though not yet our home country...)

What the world needs now is love, sweet love.

Like the sweet love I have with

My best friend,

My partner,

and now,

My legal betrothed and oh-so-soon to be legal husband!


I love you, Mark.


Lee

Monday, June 16, 2008

Countdown to Gay Marriage in California - Our Love Gets Some Respect, back in 100 B.C., and Tomorrow, too!

The Roman poet Juvenal wrote this, almost 2000 years ago:


"Tomorrow with dawn I must attend
In yonder vale." "What for?" "Why ask? A
friend
Takes him a husband there and bids a few
Be present." Wait awhile and we shall view
Such contracts formed without shame or fear
And entered on the records of the year.


A friend takes him a husband there and bids a few Be present. Wow.

That resonates through the centuries to right now, doesn't it?

Same Sex marriage licenses are available TOMORROW, Tuesday June 17th, 2008, here in the state of California, on the west coast of the United States of America!

It only took us one thousand nine hundred-some years to catch up with the Ancient Romans, who knew this TRUTH of humanity:

Sometimes love, once found and cherished, needs to be vowed, witnessed, celebrated and respected.


It will be nice to have my love get a little (or maybe better said, a more equal share) of respect.

(Go ahead and cue Aretha Franklin singing "Respect" here in your mind, would ya?)

Or better yet, click on this to jumpstart the party:



Hope you can join me (and all the rest of the same-sex loving couples who plan to get married in California) in Singing and Dancing to the Countdown!

Because after all, more human rights for one, means more human rights for all!


Namaste,

Lee

Friday, June 13, 2008

So Super Duper









By Brian Anderson

Psyche doesn't really fit in with his super-powerful super-hero teammates.

Captain Idol, Halo, Sass, Briar, and Tink all have amazing super-powers, yet all Psyche can do is kind of tell (empathically) when something evil is rampaging the city. But, he likes the perks of being famous without having to break a sweat, so it works for him.

One super hero day, Psyche's forced to help fight a monster and he totally wimps out. Halo wants to kick him off the team, but Pysche's agent (who can't pronounce his name) has a plan to save him - by having Psyche come out so they can publicize the team's "diversity."

Psyche has no idea what his agent is talking about. Come out?

It turns out everyone (but him and his best gal pal) knows he is so - totally - gay.


Psyche's adventures continue in (so far) four issues of this gay comic. Besides figuring out his own identity and powers, there's the tension with his superhero teammates (especially Halo, who hates him), the nail biting death of one of the team, and a possible love-interest for Pysche in the guy half of a wonder twin bro and sis team, the hunky Comet...


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Thursday, June 12, 2008

House of the Muses: The Latter Days of Sappho of Lesbos, vol #2 - The Quality of Hatred


By Pam Harrison

Pam's lesbian historical romance saga, "House of the Muses: The Latter Days of Sappho of Lesbos" continues with Vol. 2 - The Quality of Hatred.

Dika has been viciously attacked. But despite the threats against her life and those she cares for, Dika finds herself drawn headlong into a deadly conspiracy that threatens everything she holds dear.


Check out this page view of the 3-D action:



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Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Gravel Queen

By Tea Benduhn

How do you juggle new love and old friends?

Aurin
and her two pals Kenney (a girl) and Fred spend the summer before their Senior year of High School hanging out in their small town's park and taking ballroom dancing lessons.

When a new girl, Neila, moves to their town, Aurin discovers an attraction that she hadn't really explored before.

As Aurin awakens to this new lesbian relationship, Kenney feels threatened, and Aurin has to figure out how to balance her future and her past.


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Tuesday, June 10, 2008

Totally Joe


By James Howe

A Sequel to "The Misfits," this book is about Joe. He's 12 and knows he's Gay, and through the "alphabiography" he's been assigned to write, he tells us about his life in essays A to Z.

Joe has a crush on another boy in his school, but he has to find a way past rumors of a kiss, homophobia, and a bully to come out - as a happy with himself gay kid.


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Monday, June 9, 2008

The Misfits


By James Howe

7th grade sucks when you don't fit in, and everyone calls you names.

"Fatso!"

"Know-It-All!"

"Fairy!"

"Geek!"

Well Bobbie (who's overweight), Addie (who's smart and outspoken), Joe (who's effeminate and gay) and Skeezie (who everyone thinks is a 'hooligan') are four misfits who decide they're going to do something about it.

They form a third political party for the student council elections, and their platform is about ending name-calling once and for all...


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Friday, June 6, 2008

Girl Walking Backwards


By Bett Williams

Skye is 15, and going to a new High School in Santa Barbara, California.

She signs up for the volleyball team because the girls on the team are hot, but can't quite bring herself to approach any of them.

Then she meets goth Jessica, whose takes Skye into her life of raves, drugs and sex.

But there's another girl, Lorri, from volleyball, who Skye is interested in, too...

While trying to figure things out, Skye makes some friends she didn't expect, and has to deal with her New Age-obsessed and unhappy-to-have-a-lesbian-daughter Mom.


Check out this interview with the author (and chapter excerpts) here!

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Thursday, June 5, 2008

I've Known Since I Was Eight


By Sophie Glasser

Sarah's in High School.

She's closeted, but with her bisexual friend's encouragement and her grandmother's love, she works up the courage to approach a girl she really likes.

It blooms into her first lesbian relationship, and suddenly Sarah's faced with coming out to her whole world...


"I've Known Since I Was Eight" was a work of passion that Sophie published herself.

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Wednesday, June 4, 2008

Majority Rules: Gay Marriage, Super-Delegates, and the TRUE meaning of Democracy





So it turns out that a proposition to amend the California Constitution to take away the right to marry for Gays and Lesbians will be on the November 2008 ballot. My rights will come down to a simple majority vote.

This after the California Supreme Court, only two weeks ago, finally struck down the state laws that denied legal marriage to Gay and Lesbian couples (by a 4-3 vote.) We're waiting for June 17 for the ruling to take effect which will let me and my TRUE LOVE of 11 years go get a marriage license, but have been worried about the possibility of the Court issuing a "stay" which would prevent any same sex marriages until after the "will of the people" vote in November.

But a half hour ago, this news item was released:

Calif. Supreme Court Refuses To Delay Gay Marriage Ruling
by The Associated Press

Posted: June 4, 2008 - 12:45 pm ET

(San Francisco, California) California's highest court has refused to stay until after the November election its decision legalizing same-sex marriage in the state.

Conservative religious and legal groups had asked the California Supreme Court to stop its order from becoming effective until voters have the chance to weigh in on the issue.

An initiative that would amend the state constitution to ban gay marriage has qualified for the ballot. Its passage would overrule the court's decision.

The Supreme Court says its ruling will be final at 5 p.m. on June 16.

That's so exciting! I'm going to get legally married!

But, what will happen in November if the "will of the people" decide that I shouldn't have the right to be married, after all?





Barack Obama is leading in popular votes for the Democratic Presidential Nomination (in fact AP just reported yesterday that he's won the nomination, according to their discussions with super delegates...)

But Hilary Clinton has spent much of her time lately hoping the Super Delegates would "appoint" her as the nominee instead, leading to charges of her intending to defy "the will of the people."

Which brings to mind the outrage we all felt when Bush won the presidency due to the electoral college even though Gore had won the popular vote.

It seems, for the moment at least, that the Super-delegates have gone with the majority of voters and selected Barack Obama. But it's not final yet. And it's fascinating that they COULD have chosen differently... (Might they still change their minds?)


It all leads to our needing to take a look at what Democracy truly is. What does OUR Democracy stand for?



Is Democracy purely mob rule, majority rule, winner-take-all, will of the people?

Or is a True Democracy more guided? Does it take care of the minority, even when it's not what the majority would vote to do?

This is exactly why we have a Constitutional Democracy, with legislative, judicial and executive branches of power. The idea being that sometimes, you have to protect minorities from the "tyranny of the majority." (That phrase was used by Alexis de Tocqueville in his "Democracy in America," a hugely successful two part book from 1835 and 1840 that looked at what made our USA brand of democracy work so well.)

Let's apply this idea of Democracy's duty to guard against the tyranny of the majority to a closely related social issue:

Interracial Marriage

It was 1948 when the California Supreme Court finally struck down the laws against interracial marriage. (The U.S. Supreme Court didn't do it until 1967.) But a majority of voters did not approve of interracial marriage until 1991.

Yup, you read that right. 1991 was the first year a majority of Americans approved of interracial marriage.

Check out this mind-blowing chart of the slow progress of tolerance and acceptance of couples of different ethnic backgrounds falling in love. It (and the photo collage of same sex couples above) are from this great site, marriageequality.org.


Imagine if the right for interracial couples to marry had waited until 1991, when the majority of Americans "approved!" Think of all the families YOU know, who, not allowed to be legally married, would have been truly second class citizens...

And now, just when it seems that here in California our Gay brothers and sisters are finally going to be treated like first class citizens, and granted their right (our right) to marry, we're being told - wait! A majority needs to approve this.

(Did I mention that TWICE the California legislature passed same-sex marriage laws that would have let Gay and Lesbian couples marry (without forcing any religion or clergy to officiate) and our Governor Schwarzenegger vetoed it? Twice!!)

Argh! Double Argh!!

But even when my rights seem to come down to the "will of the people," there is some hope...

A Field Poll, which surveys California voters, on Wednesday May 28, 2008, reported that for the first time, a MAJORITY of California voters are in support of allowing same-sex marriage in California. It was approved by a 51% to 42% margin statewide. We caught up much quicker than interracial marriage did...

It's interesting that when you break it down by age, 68% of 18-29 year olds support same-sex marriage (only 25% of them disapprove), and it's only once you look at voters 65 years and older that there is no longer a majority in favor of same-sex marriage (they oppose it 55% to 36% who approve.)

Which brings up the issue of suffrage (the civil right to vote.) What if Teenagers were allowed to vote? What if every 13-17 year old was allowed to weigh in on this issue? Would that help balance out all those prejudiced 65 and up voters?


If California voters do amend the state constitution to deny a minority rights in November, it would be the exact opposite of the intent of our constitutional democracy.

The "constitutional" part is to defend the minority against the tyranny of the majority. Or, to paraphrase Alexis de Toqueville's warning, to avoid:

The judgement of the wise subordinated to the prejudices of the ignorant.


So, let's hope the TRUE meaning of Democracy shines through in November. It shone through today with the California Supreme Court's decision NOT to delay same sex marriages until November. It will shine through on June 17 when my love and I go pick up our marriage license. And heck, why not have it shine through EVERY day?




We have a great country here. Let's not forget the things that make it great. That made it (in the not so recent past) a beacon of hope and liberty. A place that once again can be an engine for positive change, for green energy and enterprise, for freedom, for peace, and for liberty and justice for all.

That's the TRUE meaning of our Democracy.

And now I need to go plan a wedding... My own!

Namaste,

Lee

Tuesday, June 3, 2008

Wide Awake


By David Levithan

In a Future America, a Gay Jewish man is elected President of the United States.

But, the Governor of Kansas contests the election outcome, calling some votes "invalid," so he can change the results in his state. That would mean his party's candidate would win not just Kansas, but the White House as well!

Well, Duncan (17) and his boyfriend Jimmy decide they won't stand for it, and they join the countless others descending on Kansas for the demonstrations and protests.

It's a journey that changes them, their love, and America... forever.


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Monday, June 2, 2008

Call Me By Your Name


By Andre Aciman

Elio is 17, and spending this summer like all the others in his life, at his family's home on the Italian Riveria.

Like every other summer, his family hosts a university student for six weeks to help Elio's father with his research.

But the student this summer is Oliver, a 24 year old American whom Elio befriends.

Every swim, game of tennis, and run along the Italian Rivera the two share is fraught with the tension of their mutual attraction.

When their relationship explodes into full passion and complete intimacy, they are both changed forever.


This book won the 2008 Lambda Literary Award for best Men's Fiction book published in 2007! And even though the publisher isn't pushing it as a Young Adult novel, I am including it here on this blogsite because "Call Me By Your Name" is the story of a Teen's first love.

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